What to Do When Your Inner Critic Won’t Stop

(button clicks) (easy music) Headspace Studios. (gentle music) Hi, welcome to Radio Headspace. It's Dora. Thanks so much for joining me today. So I was talking to a friend who was going through a hard time a few weeks ago. And they were feeling stuck, doubting themselves, feeling like they had to have it all figured out. And without even thinking, I said, "You're doing better than you think. You're allowed to go slow. You're still growing." And in that moment, something inside me softened, because I realized those words weren't just for them. Those were words my younger self had always longed to hear. (gentle music continues) Sometimes healing doesn't look like some big dramatic moment. It looks like quietly becoming the person you needed when you were younger. The calm voice, the steady hand, the reminder that you're enough, even in the messy in-between parts. And the beautiful thing is you can give that to yourself now. You can offer what wasn't offered, say what was never said, and be the presence that your younger you needed, but maybe didn't receive. And that's the essence of self-parenting, a practice rooted in mindfulness and self-compassion. It's not about blaming or fixing the past, it's about nurturing the parts of us that are still healing. (gentle music continues) I have this memory from childhood. I was maybe 9 or 10. And I had gotten in trouble at school for something small, like talking out of turn or forgetting an assignment. It wasn't a big deal, but I remember the wave of shame that hit me. Not because anyone yelled, but because I was already so hard on myself. I went home that day and sat in silence, afraid to tell anyone, afraid that that one mistake meant I was bad. Fast forward to a few years ago, I had just started working in a new role and there was pressure, lots of eyes on me. And in one moment I slipped up. I missed a detail in an important project. And instantly that same old feeling washed over me, tight chest, sinking stomach, the inner critic whispering, "See, you always mess things up. You're not good enough for this." But something different happened this time. Instead of believing that voice, I paused. I took a breath, I put a hand on my heart, and without even thinking about it, I said softly, "It's okay. You're learning. You're allowed to make mistakes, and you're still worthy of love." It felt awkward, but also healing. In that moment, I wasn't just comforting my adult self, I was speaking directly to that little girl who didn't know how to soothe herself, who thought perfection was the only way to earn love. And I realized I didn't need someone else to show up and say the right thing anymore. I could become that person for me. (gentle music continues) So if you find yourself on this journey of healing, of getting to know your inner...