Overcome Self-Judgment and Build Self-Compassion

(bright music) Headspace Studio. Hi friends, it's Rosie here. Welcome to Radio Headspace and to Wednesday. So I've always been my own harshest critic. Whether it's about my work, my relationships, or my personal goals. I tend to set incredibly high standards for myself. And honestly, I can't even pinpoint where it comes from. I didn't grow up with any external pressure from my parents. I didn't have demanding teachers, and I wasn't really concerned with awards. Growing up in East LA surrounded by gang violence and chaos, I had plenty of external challenges. But self-imposed pressure was a different beast altogether. Recently, while working on a new project, I found myself slipping into that all too familiar pattern of self-judgment and negative self-talk. It was a stark reminder of how challenging it can be to practice self-compassion, even when I teach it to others. So let's talk about one of the most crucial aspects of loving kindness, self-compassion. Often we find it easier to extend kindness to others, but struggle to direct that same compassion towards ourselves. I'm like, can I get an amen? Just kidding. (laughs) It's true though. In today's episode, I want us to explore how overcoming self-judgment can transform our relationship with ourselves and improve our overall wellbeing. I will never forget the night before I taught my first meditation workshop. It was a warm summer evening over a decade ago as I sat on the living room floor, sifting through handwritten notes, journals, and bits of paper. I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed by self-doubt. Thoughts like, what if I freeze? And what if I forget everything? These thoughts swirling my mind to the point of panic. I was indeed very new, and I couldn't shake off the feeling of inadequacy. I decided to take a step back and reflect on why I was feeling this way. I realized that my self-judgment was rooted in a fear of not meeting my own high expectations. At that time, I was reading a lot of Sharon Salzberg's work. I remembered her teachings and how she emphasized that loving kindness starts with oneself. If I couldn't be kind to myself, how could I genuinely teach others to do the same? A paradox indeed, my friends. As the surge of anxiety would come up, I began repeating the phrases, may I be happy. May I be healthy. May I be safe. May I live with ease. Over and over again. And with each repetition, I began to feel a slow but gradual shift. Instead of harshly judging myself, I started to feel a sense of warmth and acceptance. This reminded me of a time when I was younger, struggling with feelings of inadequacy and self-criticism. I was a first generation Mexican American growing up in East LA, trying to navigate the challenges of adolescence, the constant threat of violence, all while feeling the pressure to succeed and make my family proud. There were moments when I felt like...