How to Work with Anger in Meditation

(click sizzling) (bright music) Headspace Studios. (bright music) (gentle music) Hi, welcome back to "Radio Headspace." It's Dora. Not long ago I was in a group meditation and found myself completely distracted. But not by phone or to-do list. I was stuck in a mental loop. Replaying a conversation where I felt deeply dismissed. It was one of those moments where someone said something small but it hit a nerve. I kept rehashing it in my mind. What I should of said, what they should of said. How I could prove a point next time. And there I was... Sitting cross-legged, eyes closed, trying to find peace while fuming in silence. This is what ill will looks like in meditation. Resentment, judgment, irritation. It's the voice that says, "They were wrong," or, "This shouldn't be happening." It can be directed outward towards others or inward towards ourselves. Either way it clouds our experience, narrows our hearts and tightens our minds. But ill will isn't the enemy. Like all the hindrances, it shows up as a signpost. It lets us know, "Hey, something here hurts." And with mindfulness we can meet that hurt not with more resistance, but with a greater sense of understanding. A few years ago I went on retreat after a difficult period at work. I had just left a project that I poured my heart into. It involved designing programming, facilitating workshops, and holding space for others. Which I loved. But over time, the team dynamics started to shift. There were miscommunications, misaligned expectations, and a series of decisions made without my input that left me feeling sidelined. Even though I knew stepping away was the right call, I was still carrying the weight of that experience. The hurt, disappointment, the resentment. I told myself I was there to reset, to let go and to soften. But every time I sat down to meditate, my mind went back to that same looping story. The unfairness, the betrayals, the words I never got to say. I was frustrated that I couldn't drop it. But a teacher on retreat offered something that shifted me. He said, "ill will is a form of pain. "Don't push it away. "Sit with it as you would with a friend who's been hurt." That teaching changed everything. Instead of trying to silence the angry thoughts or scold myself for having them, I began to listen to it more gently. What was I really needing? To be heard? To feel seen? To be reminded I was still worthy. Even after a hard ending. (birds chirping) I started journaling after sits. I practiced sending loving kindness to the people I was holding resentment toward. Not because I was ready to forgive, but because I wanted to move forward. And over time something softened. The fire of ill will didn't disappear all at once. But it stopped burning me. (birds chirping) (reflective music) So if you're feeling stuck in irritation, anger or resentment, whether toward yourself or...