Navigating Friendship Breakups

So our next question is from Lindsay, and we're going to be talking about navigating friendships. I had to break up with a friend of over 20 years when I was going through infertility. She was callous and ignorant about the IVF process, and then she herself got pregnant naturally, and was again, completely inconsiderate of what I was going through. This was three years ago, and it still haunts me, because not only did I lose her, I lost two other friends in our group who sided with her. How can I move past this deep hurt? Well, Lindsey, thank you so much for writing in. And my heart goes to you about your own journey and what you have experienced. I want to talk about friendship breakups. They are hard. Friendship breakups are as hard or harder than romantic partner relationship breakups. 'Cause many times our friends have had an access to us that we have not allowed anyone else. We have been vulnerable with them. They have been on adventures with us. They've been able to go deep with us. They've held our hands through some really horrible things. They have really been there for the most exciting and joyous moments of our lives. And then when that comes to an end, it is so, so, so, so hard. There's also a grief that comes with that, like in that breakup, and it's okay to name that as grief. It's hurt, because you've been hurt and someone harmed you. But there is a grief process that you'll have to go through. And the support that you need could range from connecting with your friends that you have now and truly diving into those relationships. And you will need time to grieve what was in order to allow something else to come into your life. When you have a hurt that deep, in addition to what you are already experiencing with IVF, there may be a need to talk with someone else, a therapist, a coach. You can always reach out to a therapist or coach on our Headspace app platform. But if that's necessary, then do what needs to be done so that you can start to heal yourself from what is there. Another thought that came to mind was what forgiveness looks like in real time. We often hear people say, "You should just forgive them and move on." What that look like? First of all, no. And I don't ever wanna talk to her again. But forgiveness is not about the other person. Forgiveness is about liberating yourself from anger that is no longer serving you, or from accusations that are no longer serving you to even dwell on. Like really, really thinking about what do you need to forgive from the other person? And also there has to be a willingness to explore within yourself. Do you need to forgive yourself for some things that you might have contributed to in this relationship breakup?...